Meaningful Christmas

We have marked another December 25th. Regardless of our circumstances, the arrival of Jesus on earth inspires in Christians awe and joy. It certainly did so in the shepherds who witnessed him as a newborn (Luke 2:8-18). And His birth is full of meaning for us. The true light that enlightens every human being was coming into the world (John 1:9). Also, the promised King had arrived to establish His long-awaited Kingdom (Matthew 4:17,23).

The events around his birth, furthermore, have set in place parts of the foundation of our faith. First, His perfect humanity: the Son of God, an equal member of the Holy Trinity, set aside the privileges of divine life to become fully human—Emmanuel, God with us (Philippians 2:5-8). And second: the virgin birth of Jesus accomplished by the operation of the Holy Spirit in Mary his mother (Matthew 1:18-25, Luke 1:26-38). The creeds cite these as basic tenets. We cannot consider ourselves Christians unless we believe these truths.

The Life that began with Jesus’s birth culminated in his death, resurrection and ascension. From that Life many blessings flow. We all recognize that he delivered us from our sins and re-established our relationship with the Father. In addition, incredibly, He came to live in us. Just as the Spirit of God formed His human life within Mary, so the Holy Spirit that was poured out in the Day of Pentecost deposits Him—with a share of His divine life—in our hearts. This is the life of the New Birth. God brings us into His family as newborn infants who are, nevertheless, sisters and brothers of Jesus Christ. 

This Christmas gave me another opportunity to reflect on the miraculous birth of my Lord Jesus Christ. I also feel profoundly grateful for another miracle: the second birth that He has bestowed on all who have received Him (John 1:12), even me. This birth opens the way for the work of transformation, which is our journey of spiritual maturation. “See what kind of love the Father has given us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are” (1 John 3:1).

&&&

An Alternate Take on Graduation

Congratulations on your graduation! It is a milestone for you, the end of one thing and the beginning of something else. The speeches at the ceremony undoubtedly pointed out its importance in our society: a step in your progression to adulthood, toward independence and self-sufficiency, perhaps even leadership.

This is not necessarily a bad thing. God meant it to be part of His plan for your life. I remember my own high school graduation and looking forward to continuing my education. At the same time, I would encourage you to recall another milestone in your life—when you received Jesus Christ as Savior, and you took the step of water baptism. It’s another memory that you and I have in common. That event also was the end of one kind of life and the beginning of another. It meant deliverance from our sins and a commitment to Jesus. 

I didn’t realize, at the time, however, how momentous a commitment it really was. It, in fact, amounts to turning our backs on the system on which all the societies of the world are built. We do this for the sake of following the rightful King of this planet (not to mention the entire universe). If you want the details, they’re in a book that I know you have. 

So, going forward, our goals don’t match up with those of other people who don’t follow Jesus. Instead of progression toward adulthood, which is defined in terms of the years you have lived and things you have accomplished, “we are to grow up in every way… into Christ” (Ephesians 4:15). Instead of independence we rely on grace to live “in a manner worthy of the calling to which [we] have been called” (Ephesians 4:1). As for self-sufficiency, of course we must be prepared to support ourselves, but our identity is in Christ rather than a career or achievements or some personal characteristic. 

We have the rest of our lives to work—by grace—toward these goals. Just don’t put it off, because before you know it you’ll be 30, then 50, and your best opportunities to participate in God’s service will have disappeared behind you. Again, congratulations on your graduation. Getting there required effort, and Jesus was there to help you. As you move on from high school, don’t forget the more important, meaningful and enduring milestone that came before graduation.

&&&

Interior Design

Where I work, there is a television in the break room. It’s on all the time. Consequently, I get to see bits and pieces of the many home shows that are popular now. I enjoy the glimpses I get of the planning, the demolition and construction phases of the renovation, and especially the unveiling of the final product. After all the expense, the difficult decisions, the waiting and anticipation, it’s a joy to see the homeowner thrilled with the outcome. Imagine the joy that God feels when He transforms a child of His!

In this metaphor, we are the home. But unlike an ordinary home, we have agency in the process. God, the designer and builder, respects our choices. Any designer can impose his or her own vision on a home. A good designer will bend that vision to what we need and what we want. A great designer will impart his or her vision to us. And in a flash of insight, that vision turns out to be what we really needed and wanted all along but didn’t know it. That’s our Lord.

In Eden, our original parents rejected His vision for them. The Children of Israel, whom God delivered from Egypt with a mighty hand, rejected His vision for them. For us, it’s a matter of exchanging the vision we have for ourselves with the vision He has for us. Only He can conduct us from where we are, just as we are, to His vision of what He would have us to be. He has the master plan. He has the wisdom and skill for its implementation. The sooner I get in step with Him, the sooner we will have the thrilling masterpiece He has in mind: conformity with the image of His Son, Jesus Christ.

&&&

Patient Endurance

My wife and I were walking on the beach at sunrise this morning. Clouds on the horizon blocked our view of the sun. My camera remained at my side. A fellow beach-walker, also armed with a camera, turned back. “Let’s hope that tomorrow is better,” she said in passing. About half an hour later, the sun rose above the cloud bank in a glorious display. It made me think about all the times I, too, missed out on God-given opportunities because I gave up too soon. 

Also this morning, I read an excerpt from an essay entitled “Rooted and Grounded,” by T. Austin-Sparks: 

We are in the Lord’s hands, and being in His hands we are in the hands of a Potter Who knows what He is after… first of all, the vessel is in the potter, and then eventually the potter is in the vessel. What we mean is this, that before ever the potter starts, the vessel is in his mind, in his heart very clearly. The pattern is not something objective, the vessel is already a complete thing in him; and then he gets to work upon it and when he is finished, he is in the vessel he has wrought. What was in Him has come out in it. We say of people’s work: “I can see who made that, it is just like them.” “That is just like So-and-so to make a thing like that.” Yes, He is in His work, He is in the vessel that He makes, and that is just what He is doing. Sometimes that clay has to be pressed down to a shapeless mass, broken. It is not showing all that He intended it to show, there are defects and flaws, and so He crushes it down to shapelessness. A mass without shape. But it is to start again to get something more perfect than has been before, in which He Himself is.

Currently, I’m also re-reading Frank Viola’s book, “Hang On, Let Go.” This book, in my opinion, is pure gold for those who are objects of God’s perfecting work. Here are a few quotes from the chapter I reached today:

A large part of the kingdom message [that is, the kingdom of God] is that Jesus wants to conquer every inch of our beings for Himself.
The kingdom, where God accomplishes His will in and through us, is available to everyone. But it requires surrender.
It also requires that we “go though many hardships” (Acts 14:22)….
Often, the Lord will bring us through a great trial to discipline and train us so that we will learn righteousness in the closed off areas of our hearts….
The purpose of suffering, sorrow, and tribulation is not punishment. Jesus paid for our sins on the cross. The punishment is complete. Suffering, sorrow, and tribulation are for discipline—for child training. They are not without purpose.

Maybe you, like me, are a sincere follower of Jesus Christ who is going through a rough time. It is to do us good in the end. Perhaps we feel that we are being crushed to shapelessness. We should not blame it on forces of evil—although we are not blind to their involvement—or on a vengeful God—this is not His character. Here are voices encouraging us to resist the urge to turn back. To keep the faith. To patiently endure the adversity that our Lord is using to transform us. We will see the light again one day, and the glory will belong to Him.

&&&

Devotion

Jesus invites us to devote ourselves to him. “Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need” (Matthew 6:33). Where the Kingdom is, there also is the King. “If you love me, obey my commandments…. All who love me will do what I say. My Father will love them, and we will come and make our home with each of them” (John 14:15, 23). We who have received his life are learning to live by his love, becoming a home to the very God.

We know from personal experience that human nature tends toward devotion to other things. Things that captivate and enslave us. “Do not love this world, nor the things it offers you, for when you love the world, you do not have the love of the Father in you” (1 John 2:15). Recall the account of Ananias and Sapphira as recorded in Acts 5:1-11. They wanted to create the appearance of devotion, but without the reality of it (2 Timothy 3:5). There was precedent for this kind of duplicity. Consider, for example, Saul, king of Israel, when he failed to destroy the Amalekites (1 Samuel 15). 

They exemplify the teaching of Jesus, that our hearts will follow our treasure—the things that we value the most (Matthew 6:21). The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ liberates us from all other objects of devotion, and allows us to devote ourselves to him, as we keep turning to him. “We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne” (Hebrews 12:2).

He gave us our faith in the first place, and he intends to perfect it. He shows us the joy that he has set before us. This joy comes through a revelation of the Father’s plan for creation, which will cause us to fall in love with His Son and place all our hope in His Kingdom. Joy, in turn, helps us to endure the cross—the experiences that God sends to transform us. Because our Father is so faithful to us, He raises us along with His Son and seats us beside His throne (Ephesians 2:4-7).

Jesus, thou joy of loving hearts,
Thou fount of life, thou light of men,
From the best bliss that earth imparts
We turn unfilled to thee again.
Bernard de Clairvaux

&&&

Transformation and Life

I started this blog nearly four years ago. My aim was to work through things that the Lord was showing me about walking with Him. I am on the journey from my new birth in Christ toward spiritual maturity. At the same time, I am shedding the burden of limiting ideas that I acquired from my Christian past. All of this is an ongoing experience. 

In recent months I took a break to deal with some serious personal and family issues. Many of these also are ongoing. This whole time, the Lord was both faithful and good. I also noticed in myself a tendency to see the process of my transformation as a thing in itself, more mechanical or transactional rather than an organic part of living in Christ. 

Real spiritual maturity follows from spiritual growth. Spiritual growth happens as I allow the life of Christ Jesus to gain more ground in my will, intellectual life and emotional life. Turning from self to focus on Christ is a practical matter. It is the work of the Holy Spirit to apply the cross to the old nature and replace it with resurrection life. It is a product of actual events that I experience, and how I respond to them. Not that I can earn anything by my own efforts. I have the ability, however, to cooperate with the divine project and keep the faith.

I look forward, this year, to whatever He sends my way. When I respond in a way that expresses the life of Christ I praise Him. When my response comes out of my old nature I turn to Him, and acknowledge my need for more of His life.

&&&

Strength from Weakness

The apostle Paul addressed the Corinthian church in this striking passage (2 Corinthians 12:7-10):

Therefore, so that I would not become arrogant, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of satan to trouble me—so that I would not become arrogant. I asked the Lord three times about this, that it would depart from me. But he said to me, “My grace is enough for you, for my power comes to full strength in weakness.” So, then, I will boast most gladly about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may reside in me. Therefore I am content with weaknesses, with insults, with troubles, with persecutions and difficulties for the sake of Christ, for whenever I am weak, then I am strong.

I have a few points regarding this rich word. For many of these insights I am indebted to Frank Viola, and to writings of T. Austin-Sparks, particularly his book entitled The Gospel of John:

  1. The gift. Paul’s thorn in the flesh was given to him; it was a gift. From whom? He tells us that it was a messenger of satan, so did it come from satan? The Almighty God permitted it, and refused to remove it, so did it come from God? Paul doesn’t provide us with an easy answer. The thorn he saw plainly as something malicious from God’s enemy. Simultaneously, though, he knew that God kept it there for his benefit, a guardrail to keep him from becoming arrogant.
  • The pattern. This fits into a pattern. Jesus himself came not to be served but to serve, and to offer his life as a ransom. When the time came for him to be offered up, he was condemned by his own people to crucifixion, the most horrible and demeaning execution available to them. They intended for him to die as painfully as possible, and to have the never-ending shame of hanging from a tree. God took their malice and changed it into a symbol of infinite love. On the cross, we see Jesus as the Lamb of God. The same with the thorn in Paul’s flesh. It was a cross operating in his life in which he saw the malice of satan. Nevertheless, on the other side of it he experienced a new life through the abiding power of Christ. God also uses the cross in our transformation. Each of us has a self-life, the echo or remnant of our old nature. It always insists on independence from God. Brought to the cross, the influences of that self-life lose their grip on our souls, leaving more room in our souls for the life of Christ.
  • The meaning of the cross. The cross means suffering, often accompanied by humiliation, that we did not bring on ourselves. It suspends us helplessly in a position of overwhelming pain, loss, or labor. Our efforts to extricate ourselves are futile. There is no end in sight, except our own demise. Our only hope is to rely on our Lord Jesus Christ, to look to him for grace upon grace. Under what other circumstances would I turn away from my own abilities and learn the sufficiency of His grace? My strengths frustrate His power. His power comes into its own when I, for the sake of Christ, let go of my rights, abilities, interests, and ambitions. Jesus Christ is the grace of God and the power of God. Although HIs life indwells me now, the operation of the cross puts that life on display. 
  • Boasting most gladly. Paul chose to accept his weakened state with delight, which is another way of translating the expression, “I will boast most gladly.” He made this choice because the operation of the cross in his life opened the way for the power of Christ to reside in him. Furthermore, credit for anything that he accomplished while in that state would accrue to God, to the praise of His glory. 
  • The power is the expression of the life of Christ. Our yielding to the cross of weakness, loss, and shame opens our eyes to Jesus Christ enthroned on high. He is “the Man in the Glory.” Yet when He appears in the book of the Revelation, it is as a sacrificial Lamb. Our Lord continually offers Himself for His people. Paul, prior to his conversion, persecuted the early church. But when the great light from heaven struck him down on the road to Damascus, he heard Jesus demanding of him, “Why are you persecuting Me?” Christ personally experiences the sufferings of the Church. Even though He sits “far above all rule and authority and power and dominion, and above every name that is named, not only in this age but also in the one to come” (Ephesians 1:21), He also lives among His people. 
  • The power in residence. The phrase, “that the power of Christ may reside in me,” is variously translated as “rest upon,” “dwell with,” and “pitch a tent over and dwell upon”—referring to God’s presence in the tabernacle that accompanied the children of Israel in the wilderness. It is the power of Christ to transform our souls. It is the power to live continually in God’s awesome presence, in the service of the living and true God (1 Thessalonians 1:9). Also, it is the power to live in unity in the company of God’s people, and to endure faithfully in a world system that is hostile to God.
  • Contentment. Paul had made a realistic assessment of his own physical limitations, of opposition to his ministry by enemies human and supernatural, of sorrows he would experience on behalf of believers who were under attack, even of catastrophes he would suffer from forces of nature. He had settled all of that in his own mind.  That is one side of contentment. The other side is the heavenly vision. The visible world was not the source of his confidence. He had set it in the ascended Christ who intercedes for His own as He sits at the right hand of the Father.  Paul knew that the life of Christ resided within him, while his own life was hidden with Christ in God (Colossians 3:3). He also was aware that, when it comes to accomplishing His eternal purpose, the Father is unwavering. So is His intention to accomplish His purpose with the participation of transformed human beings. He gave that opportunity to Paul, and He gives it to us.

&&&

Love and Adoption

I am precious in His sight. Those He saves are His delight. He will hold me fast.

This post is adapted from an introduction I gave at the funeral of my father-in-law. I will call him Raymond, but that’s not his real name. I hope that the message will be a blessing and encouragement to a wider audience:

I am Ernest, one of Raymond’s sons-in-law. I had the privilege of knowing him in the latter third of his life. Those of us who were familiar knew that he had a certain simplicity about him. His life was not one for the history books. It’s most notable features were his long life of 97 years, his long marriage of 65 years, and his three amazing children. He could not take complete credit for any of these. He wasn’t the central character in the story of his own life. Instead, the events of other people’s stories always swirled around him.

Nevertheless, spending time with him definitely had its rewards. Everybody knew of his astounding memory for people, places, dates and events. He loved to tell stories out of his many experiences, although they might be the same stories over and over. Many of those experiences were unpleasant but they didn’t embitter him. In fact, he had a remarkable ability to laugh at himself. The older he got, the sweeter he became. When I asked his permission to marry his oldest daughter, he gladly adopted me into the family. As the years passed, my wife and I could see something shining out of him more and more. I think it was God’s love.

For God, love is His character. He made all of creation because of His love. We humans are the masterpiece of that creation. There’s nothing I can do to make Him run out of love for me. It’s real, it’s solid. I didn’t, and couldn’t, earn it. God loved all of humanity so much that He freely gave His only Son, and whoever believes in the Son will have everlasting life.

The gift of God’s Son was an expression of love, a real gift, one that requires a real response. Basically, there are three ways I as a human can respond to God’s love: I can withdraw from it, I can try to exploit it for my own gain, or I can relax into His embrace.

Raymond chose to go the third way, to simply receive Him. And everyone who receives Him, who believes in His name, God adopts as a child of His own household. So, from accepting the gift of God’s love we can have everlasting life. We can experience adoption as sisters and brothers into the family of God.

It follows that our external accomplishments aren’t the important thing. That’s not the way that God defines success. What matters is what we allow Him to do for us. It’s not about making the pages of the history books. It’s about God enrolling us in His book, the Book of Life. Maybe Raymond wouldn’t have put it this into these words, but that’s how he was learning to live.

So, one week ago today, Jesus took him home to meet the rest of his family. We will miss him.

&&&

Blindness and Sight

There are known knowns. There are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns. That is to say, we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns, the ones we don’t know we don’t know. -Donald Rumsfeld

I’m considering the plight of the man who was born blind. John recounts the story in the ninth chapter of his gospel. This man certainly knew that he could not “see,” that he was “blind.” His parents and others had been telling him so ever since he could remember. And he was aware of lacking a capability that people in general clearly had. That’s why he had to sit in a public place, begging.

But he could not have had any concept of what sight is to us who see. First, he had no neural networks for processing the light that fell on him from all directions. These networks develop in infancy as the brain receives signals from the eyes, and for him that wasn’t happening. Their absence distinguishes people who are born blind from those who acquire blindness later in life. Consequently, he had no idea of what it means to see. It was not that he simply couldn’t understand what he saw—it was that he had no acquaintance with light. He didn’t know what he was missing even though he knew he was missing something. We might describe this situation by saying that he had no category for seeing.

Of course, we know that Jesus gave the beggar his sight. In the man’s own words, “The man called Jesus made mud and smeared my eyes and said to me, ‘Go to Siloam and wash.’ So I went and washed and received my sight.” Although the beggar had not asked Jesus to do anything for him, he received an incredible gift. 

The work that Jesus accomplished in this man was so profound that it is hard for us to grasp. The operation literally required the rewiring of the man’s brain. This feat remains far beyond the ability of any modern physician. Praise the Lord for grace that does the impossible! But even before performing this miracle, Jesus had informed his disciples of its real purpose: to make visible the works of God. In other words, that they (his followers) and others might see something of the Father. 

Jesus lived to reveal the Father. Once, Philip, who was one of his followers, remarked, “Lord, show us the Father, and it is enough for us.” Jesus replied, “Have I been so long with you, and you still do not know me, Philip? Whoever has seen me has seen the Father. How can you say, ‘Show us the Father’? Do you not believe that I am in the Father and the Father is in me?” (John 14:8-10). If Jesus had not put the Father on display for us in his own life, we could not know Him. We had no category, apart from the perfect example of Jesus, for a God such as He is. 

In his reply to Philip, Jesus included an insight into his own relationship with the Father. When he said, “I am in the Father and the Father is in me,” he presented to us a mind-altering reality. Jesus, completely human, could be the dwelling place of God the Father. And he, as man, could dwell in God the Father. Everything that Jesus said and did—like giving sight to a man born blind—had its source in that relationship with the Father. Jesus didn’t stop there. “Truly, truly, I say to you, whoever believes in me will also do the works that I do; and greater works than these will he do, because I am going to the Father” (John 14:12). When he spoke of going to the Father, he was referring to his death, resurrection, and ascension. What he meant by “greater works than these is a topic for prayerful consideration. My point right now is, what if Jesus had not told us of the indwelling of divine life? That we could have this hybrid sort of life, and learn to live by it? Who would have thought this possible? Yet another thing that we, apart from Jesus, had no category for.

While being interrogated about how he was able to see, the formerly blind man had witnessed faithfully of his encounter with his healer. His testimony proved his gratitude. Beyond that, he projected a deepening insight into who Jesus was: first “a man called Jesus,” then a prophet, and then “a man from God.” 

Jesus sought him out, knowing that the religious leaders had forbidden him to return to the synagogue. “Jesus heard that they had cast him out, and having found him he said, ‘Do you believe in the Son of Man?’ He answered, “And who is he, sir, that I may believe in him?’ Jesus said to him, ‘You have seen him, and it is he who is speaking to you. He said, ‘Lord, I believe,’ and he worshipped him” (John 9:35-38). 

Jesus honored this man’s openness by crowning it with a yet deeper revelation. It was a revelation of Jesus himself as Lord. Jesus must have been pleased to see the man’s willingness to take this further step of faith. And he remarked aloud, “For judgement I came into the world, that those who do not see may see, and those who see may become blind” (John 9:39).

There are paths that the Lord wants to lead us along, but that we can’t even see. “And I will lead the blind in a way that they do not know, in paths that they have not known I will guide them” (Isaiah 42:16). It is a walk of faith. It is a walk in which he gives vision to those who know that, without him, they are blind—in which he also judges those who insist that they can see on their own. 

He wants to do a profound work of transformation in us. Will we trust and obey Him without demanding that we first understand? It cannot happen any other way. Nobody else can accomplish it. And his purpose is that the works of God might be displayed in us for others to see, to the glory of God.

&&&

The Life of the Truth, Part 2

There is the witness, and there is the testimony carried by the witness. Jesus Christ works in those of us who believe, to make us witnesses who bear true testimony to Him. It is not that we hold a truth, or many truths, but we have the truth in a living way within us. He is Life and He is Truth. We have the life of the truth. So, what we say rings true to others who hear it because the testimony matches up with our life. It resonates because we are expressing our share of His life. 

The apostle Paul visited the Christians in Corinth. When he did so he was determined to know nothing among them except Christ, and Him crucified (1 Corinthians 2:2). He desired that their faith “might not rest in the wisdom of men but in the power of God.” In the previous chapter he had equated the power of God with the testimony of the cross of Christ. He did not resort to conventional rhetoric, intended to convince on an intellectual or emotional level. He was there, he says, “in weakness and in fear and much trembling.” Paul did not frame his message in “plausible words of wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and power…” (1 Corinthians 2:3-5). The witness with the crucified life carried the testimony of the cross. That life and its testimony expressed the love of God, the wisdom of God and the power of God.

What was the power of Paul’s gospel? We have an insight from Acts 13. “Brothers, sons of the family of Abraham, and those among you who fear God, to us has been sent the message of this salvation. For those who live in Jerusalem and their rulers, because they did not recognize him nor understand the utterances of the prophets, which are read every Sabbath, fulfilled them by condemning him. And though they found in him no guilt worthy of death, they asked Pilate to have him executed. And when they had carried out all that was written of him, they took him down from the tree and laid him in a tomb. But God raised him from the dead, and for many days he appeared to those who had come up with him from Galilee to Jerusalem, who are now his witnesses to the people. And we bring you the good news that what God promised to the fathers, this he has fulfilled to us their children by raising Jesus” (Acts 13:26-33).

Paul directed his message to both Jews and God-fearing Gentiles. “Those who live in Jerusalem and their rulers” were people who held the God-given truth. They did not, however, receive the testimony of Jesus. Neither were they willing to apply the Old Testament prophecies to his life. Therefore, they did not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.

During his ministry, Jesus sent out his followers to testify about him and his Kingdom. He was training them to prepare the way for him to visit local villages. It wasn’t until his ascension that Jesus first provided his followers with the indwelling life of the truth. “…you will receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you, and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the end of the earth” (Acts 1:8). The outpouring of God’s Spirit on Pentecost gave each of them a deposit of divine life. It came from Jesus, seated at the right hand of the Father, as though—so to speak—on permanent loan. That is, the gift of the life of Christ did not make its recipients divine; they nevertheless had a share of the divine life.

Paul himself became a witness, even though he began as one of those who held the truth without possessing the life of it. The Paul we see in this passage was a true servant of God. He had abandoned his own program. He fully committed himself to God’s project. And the conduct of his life supported the content of his message.

The work of transformation begins with our receiving a deposit the life of Jesus Christ. It continues as that life spreads in all directions from the center toward the circumference of our being. That work brings us to the place where we are witnesses. Others can detect in us the life of the truth. Then He teaches us what to say, so as to testify to the truth whose life we have. In this way He engages us in faithful service to the living God.

&&&